Practise what you Preach!

Never Quit without a job

2008-03-15T09:41:00.000-07:00

I got this article from an email, quite thrilling and exciting, read it through...

In the office, there are good supervisors and bad supervisors.

1.1 The Good supervisor
You are lucky, if your supervisor is good. You’ll be able to use your talent to the full and you will be encouraged to do your best. When you are given elbow room to experiment and extend yourself, work becomes a joy. You bloom and grow to your full potential.

2.1 The Lousy Supervisor
Unfortunately, there are lousy supervisors who always take advantage of their position to make life miserable for us in the office.
They:
· Abuse us
· Bully us
· Are contemptuous of us
· Envy us
· Harm us
· Malign us
· Persecute us
· Spiteful to us
· Threaten us
· Wound us
· Bulldoze us

Understand that no one bothers about you if you are not a threat or a no-body. If you do not have potential, no one will create trouble for you as no one kicks a dead dog. People will probe and test you before they mount an attack on you. When they encounter marsh, they will proceed but when they encounter steel, they will withdraw.
Before attacking, they will assess your reaction and calculate their risk:
If you show no reaction, they will be bolder
If you are timid, they will hound you
If you cave in, they will take over
If you resist, they may start a battle
If you counterattack, they may withdraw
If you build strong allies, they may leave you alone.

2.2 Your Lousy Supervisor Wins
He wins without battle, if he

(a) demoralises you to make you fearful

(b) breaks up your alliances

(d) causes distrust between you and your staff

(e) frustrates you

(f) harasses you to intimidate you

(g) irritates you to provoke you

(h) robs you of your heart

(i) undermines your determination to succeed

3.1 Art of War
In the Art of War by Sun Tzu, under the heading Strategy, it states:
"If you outnumber the enemy by ten to one, surround them; by five to one, attack them; by two to one, divide them. If you are equally matched, take the offensive. If the enemy forces are slightly stronger, prepare for defence; if vastly superior, retreat, for no matter how valiantly a small force may fight, it must succumb in the end to greater strength and numbers."

In the office environment, your immediate supervisor is always slightly stronger than you. So, you cannot be lax in not taking the initiative to prepare your defence. To win in such a situation, you have to seize and retain the initiative. If you do not take the initiative, you will usually lose.
How then do you take the initiative to prepare for your defence?
There are essentially 3 ways in your defence:

4.1 Managing our Boss (immediate supervisor)
Agenda ---To obtain the best results for our company, our boss and ourselves. This is not for political maneuvering or for apple polishing.
Purpose---To make our boss trust us so that he gives us more elbow room to do our work in the way we do best.
Procedure---To achieve that, we have to systematically work at the following Do’s and Don’ts.
Acronym ---L U C U S is the Boss

Do
(1) Look for ways to help him

a) Make him look good

b) What do I do that hampers him and to remedy it.

c) In what key areas does he need my support?

d) How can I ease his burden?

e) What is it that he finds difficult to do and how can I help?

(2) Understand his modus operandi

a) His likes and his dislikes

b) His strengths and his weaknesses

c) His needs and his wants

d) His work habits--allow him to boast about his success or hobbies, even when we are pressed for time to finish our schedule

e) His time allocation----respect his time

f) His priorities

g) His objectives and goals

(3) Cater to his communication preferences

a) If he is a listener, brief him and then follow up with a memo.

b) If he is a reader, put our proposals in a report and then discuss them with him.

c) Detailed or condensed form

d) Keep him informed

e) See him in the morning, afternoon or late evening

f) Break the ice by talking about his hobbies or sport

g) Ask him what he likes to do

(4) Use him as a resource

a) We are dumb not to consult him on important issues and major problems

b) We are learning and communicating when we ask him for help where we are unclear or uncertain of the methods of work that he wants.

c) Allow him to point out our mistakes and to guide us as a mentor

d) Touch base with him every now and then

(5) Support his success

a) Contribute to his achievements

b) See him as an ally

c) Make him as effective and as achieving as possible

d) Appreciate his pressures and goals

e) Focus to provide solutions for problems

(6) Build a cooperative relationship with him

a) Foster credibility with him by being reliable even in small matters

b) Have integrity---don’t shade the truth and play down issues

c) Cultivate good manners as they are the lubricating oil that smoothes over friction

d) Show proper respect for him and his position

e) Overrate him rather than undervalue him

f) Assume that he has the talent and accomplishments to rise to his current position

g) Allow him to talk incessantly about his successes even if our work piles up

h) Make him feel good---we invariably like the people who boost our self-esteem.

Don’t

a) Surprise him

b) Be at odds with his priorities and objectives

c) Assumed too much but clarify with him

d) Hide problems from him

e) Fit him into any preconceived mould

f) Ever run him down with people in the office

g) Catch him at a bad time

h) Be brash and confrontational in discussing issues with him

i) Be too proud to say that we do not know and ask for help from him

j) Concentrate too hard to impress---we will end up working too hard and too long

k) Lose our cool with him

4.2. Build up your weapons and ammunitions by:

1) Subtly publicising and recording your achievements, thereby showing your prowess and that you are a formidable opponent

Eg. Subtly email your supervisor and cc it to the Big Boss regarding your accomplishments. Write: I am happy to inform you . . . or I am glad to inform you. . . .

The objective is to keep the Big Boss informed about your good work.

2)Forming your allies

3)Training your staff

4)Gathering intelligence on any potential enemy

5)Instilling fear in your enemy

6) Being politically sensitive

4.3. Always find ways to have access to the Big Boss

This is vitally important. You must prepare in advance to pitch your spin (ideas, position, slant, jokes, etc). You have only 20 seconds to do that in the lift, social meeting, his office or wherever. The idea is to make the Big Boss notice you and have favourable impression of you.

Without direct access to the Big Boss you are always at a disadvantage as you cannot give your side of your story to him.

5.1 What can you do when you are being attacked?

When attacked, act swiftly to protect yourself. Do not let the testing grow. Nip it in the bud immediately by counterattacking. You could save yourself from having to fight a battle later on.

Stand tall. Do not run. Do not allow others to bully you, to wound your ego or to undermine your confidence. Protect your ego, your self-confidence and yourself by confronting them. Fight if you must. You cannot avoid others from probing you. Respond by standing up to their probing and by attacking in order to prevent them from starting a battle with you. You must always make it very costly for the enemy to attack you so that they will think twice before launching an offensive. The enemy will leave you alone only if they are certain that it is not to their advantage to attack you.

5.2 Attack is a better form of Defence

You owe it to yourself to defend yourself. To do this, always remember to take the initiative, for the art of defence lies in the planning of an attack and the secret of defence is attack. Attack is always a better form of defence and requires offensive tactics such as:

(a) manage your supervisor

(b) the building-up of ammunitions and weapons,

e.g. by persistently asking relevant questions

5.3 Remember not to Fight Unnecessarily

(a) Do not attack unless you have initially probed and tested your enemy.

(b) Do not fight before you are fully aware of the details of the situation.

(d) Do not fight unless there is no other alternative.

(e) Do not fight unless you wish to gain some definite advantage.

(f) Do not start a fight out of annoyance or desire for revenge.

(g) To conquer without fighting is better than trying to win by fighting every inch of the way.

5.4 Counterattack when the Battle has Started

(a) Fighting has no rigid rules. Always be flexible and innovative in battle.

(b) Attack the enemy’s weaknesses, avoid his strengths.

(d) Concentrate the attack on specific targets.

(e) Move faster than the enemy as speed is essential in any battle.

(f) To lure the enemy out of his fortress, attack some of his vulnerable positions.

(g) You must choose the battle ground and lure your enemy to it.

(h) In a battle, it is vital to anticipate the enemys plan.

6.1 Consequences when you counterattack
Time and again, it has been found that good work alone in the office is not good enough. The best action for you is to take the initiative to build your defences (see items 4.1, 4.2, 4.3) before there is an attack. For some people this comes naturally. But if you choose not to take the initiative to prepare for your defence, you may find that you have little choice but to counterattack when the battle has started.
When you counterattack you must be prepared to face the consequences:
a) Change to a different division or section, if you can.
b) Slog it out. This is no fun. It is terrible and miserable.
c) Quit---but do so only after you have got the new job. Never quit without a job! You are always at a great disadvantage during the interview if you are without a job.

7.1 Never quit without a job!
You must never `quit when the going is tough’ or ‘resign from the painful field' or `flee in danger's hour'. Never quit simply because it is problematical. You must never go out of the situation simply because it is difficult.
Look for direction and take active steps to change your position inside or outside the organization. That means that you must act and do whatever you can---use your intelligence, experience, consult family, friends, Internet, experts, prayers, apply for jobs---to find a solution to your problem.
You have to trust that “good” can come amidst your adversity just as crushed grapes can produce delicious wine. You know:
no hardened ground can bear fruit if it is not broken up by the plough;
no grain can become bread if it is not grounded and baked;
no rough diamond can be transformed to its true brilliance if it is not cut and polished and

you fall many times when you learn to roller-blade. You have to have a mind-set change to see that your adversity is a way for you to build your character and spiritual growth. And so be in a better position to understand and help others.

Wonderful 2007 year end with myFamily slide......

2007-12-30T05:21:00.001-08:00

Contentment of life

2007-12-11T02:12:00.000-08:00

Q: How can one be contented with pursuing mental and physical satisfaction?
A: Unhappiness is caused by a loss of contentment which the result of unlimited desire. People who lead a simple life are often easily contented, while those who indulge in physical satisfaction are often not contented. One needs to strike a balance between mental and physical satisfaction. To learn to be contented, it is necessary to cut down the pursuit of physical satisfaction, and lead a simple life with a grateful heart.

Q: Do you ask somebody for help when you encounter a problem or do you solve the problem with the help of your own wisdom and the Master's teachings? The Master often reminds us to guard our conscience ourselves as she cannot possibly pay close attention to every single person.
A: Since your involvement in Tzu Chi work is a kind of spiritual cultivation, you should always keep these things in mind: be tolerant of adversity, remain vigilant at all times, respond promptly , and learn to 'let go' once the issue is dealt with. Sometimes, I do encounter problems. however, I am able to speed up my problem-solving gradually. As I no longer have any cravings, I have fewer problems than before. It is important to build a wide network of friends as you will meet wise people who can help you out when you encounter problems.

I get this above articles from the The World of Tzu Chi, 2007-11 edition by David Liu. Just makes me think of my life should be getting into simple and tolerant living instead of the unnecessary complicated pursuing that bring us the unhappiness. Let go gradually what we think we have to get more and more.....

Upset for the sake of RM5 late charge?

2007-12-02T19:24:00.000-08:00

Oooh..., in this lovely and sunny Sunday morning, it should make me great and spirit-uplifted.
Then, once I have checked the banking online credit card bill, ophhsssss, I spotted a Wondering 'late payment charges-RM5' in my last month statement.

A thousand Q in my mind even if i got pay it on the exact due date time.
Is the bank mistakenly charged and printed?
Is the bank hanky-panky treat with this 'hidden cost' stuff?

I got a bit mischievous and irritating, and make a call to this 'oversea bank' about the matter. What the operator reply make me more unbelievable and annoying, which is due to the 'Cheque' is needed for clearing for 2-3 days in central bank and then only the bank only 'recognize' the cheque once is cleared for this process.
Can I loose my temper and throw a tantrum like a toddler to this innocent operator, even if she agreed to waive it for this time but advised me to pay in early day than the due date?

Ya, a good reason and explanation we should really appreciate.
But, don't the bank understand the consumer's knowledge about those 'banking system process' is ZERO?
As a consumer do we have to know about the bank to process the cheque payment in 3-5 days early than the credit card due date?
OMG, then as this marvelous and well-known oversea bank SYSTEM should be enhanced to be more SMART enough to cater this rather than 'I' act as a 'fussy' bank customer, that really jeopardize my high-spirit passion for the sake of the RM5 late payment charges, to make this ridiculous COMPLAIN in this wonderful Sunday....

Just loose the temper away and let go. Cool down.

Out of Control

2007-10-26T03:15:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we think we can control ourself easily: our emotion, our passion, our mindset and our time;

Somehow, sometimes we still have other factors that run out of our own control:
Can we manage to cool down the emotion if someone tick you off seriously?
Can we manage to wane away the passion if a baby cry out loud continuously?
Can we manage to believe what it is fair and square if someone make it impaired intentionally?
Can we manage to follow the schedule if someone have their own priority?

Then, we start suspecting what we are doing, do and done.
Then, we keep on bubbling, grumbling and complaining.
Then, we get blue MOST of the time in the blue month.
Then, we accept what other do is right even it is incorrect?
Then, it loops in routine in our life again and over again.

Out of control?
This is our life?

I am experiencing, searching and adjusting in the dilemma.
How to get out of it?
It is just a time factor.

Bloody auspicious wedding seasonS

2007-09-30T08:19:00.000-07:00

Woo, it is a year i get married, what a wonderful new-wed life yet. Nevertheless, again since Sept and Oct onwards till the end of year, as malaysian chinese couples are always keen to tie the know in these auspicious and favorable period.

So, most of us will 'EASILY' get invited for 2 - 3 wedding dinner a month, no kidding it sounds like a honor, credit and proud to get this 'Red Bomb'. Then, any 'honorable' one would have to spare a year end budget for funding the investment, which for single would get the Return one-shot if he or she get to the altar soon. Otherwise, the married like me is starting to pay back the interest of return (kidding ya).

Raymond & Jessica's Bigday

Ommphsss, where are the married couples' photos?

Anyway, it really really not only the couples get happy but also the rest of the family, relatives and friends would take this opportunity to get together for the sake of re-Union and reminisce the old school events. It is cool and interesting to get to know the old folks or old foes, just the year end bonus would be cut down a bit. Chiss....

Finally, I manage to get the Raymond & Jessica's Bigday photos, have a look!

New BB is coming to town!!!

2007-09-20T03:16:00.000-07:00

Woooooooo my little cute bb is born. so excited and unexplainable in words! It is really grateful to get a bb girl, no matter smile and cry, that complete us.

Share my joyful and happiness to others, and thanks for others congratulation and regards.

A year in Tokyo and Not in KL

2007-08-15T07:00:00.000-07:00

Woo.... It is still cannot imagine i have been in this metro-city over a year. What I learned, I earned, I listened and I shared, I really really appreciated and enjoyed. I have experienced what I have never ever get again, i presumed! But, I still have to thank all the people who lend their hand for me and share all the happiness and grieves. I am supposed a guy who really active, over-active, sensitive and sensible, but i might be the one who extremely go beyond it, but in here i truly learn to give and take, still in learning.

A year ago, i was single then change my status to Not-available!!! Super-Married gal. It is again i am the most gifted and lucky guy had my current lovely wife. I thank her comprehensiveness and forgiveness of my Unsound job! superb unsound and insensible job that no one really go on it. I really cannot carry on this way i believe. I have to decide to get it out of me sooooooooooooon.

So, next to my coming lovely baby girl, i wish i will carry you once you born from time to time forever, i believe i will. No one leave their family for the sake of the sake, what sake? You take then you have to give it back or let go. Sure, nothing is perfect, no one wanna be the perfect guy in this wonderful world, not even a super-----------man, for what to super?

Just be ordinary? who else would be, someone or anyone want to be. Ya, no one. But once you are no longer to get satisfaction, you are no longer to be. I feel tired of this life with WANT. no body like it but it is life to get along and get by.

malaysians in Mahathir restaurant of Tokyo

2007-04-21T06:09:00.000-07:00

It is spring time in Tokyo, everyone feels great in every time and everywhere. The PM get ready to buy us big dinner, in a malaysian ipoh-based restaurant called 'Mahathir Restaurant', for no sake.

Everyone looks great and high-spirited in this gathering, sounds like out of the jail.

The restaurant owner is a Japanese and married with a malaysian Ipoh girl for more than 20 years in Tokyo. The hostess told us that in early to mid of 90's, the restaurant is full of malaysian who 'grab golds' (illegal worker) in Tokyo. Then later, most of them get caught and send back to malaysia for illegal entrance, the restaurant sales also get impacted. Now, only those who get business trip and malaysian student in Tokyo still support the restaurant business. oh....luckily we enter in Legal passport VISA, geee.

He drunk! She sulks!

It is really the enjoyable and cheerful to get the tasteful malaysian food in Tokyo.

the Land of Disney or Dream?

2007-03-04T08:30:00.000-08:00

Disneyland, a wonderland with joyful and blissful for all the children and toddlers. So, a man like me suppose not to be in here? why? because I do not belong here and not my land anymore. Sleeping Beauty, Alice in the wonderland, Snow White and the 7 drawfs, Winnie the Pooh's, Tom and Jerry, Donald Duck, and Mickey Mouse.....it is full of Disney cartoons, and lovely story we have known since we were kids.

It was all my old old time story, but I have no more tales to tell in my early 30 yet. Probably, my wife, kids and family to get together in here would inspire me to be grateful and fruitful for our family Land in future.

a French gentleman meets with a Malaysian lady

2007-02-25T19:46:00.000-08:00

waoooooo, in this prosperous CNY season festival, there is a couple getting to tie the knot. They are from the West to meet the East, a Malaysian girl with the French gentleman love story yo!

Again, it is another Big chance for the old folks and foes gathering!

Congratulation, Bee Ean and Fabien!

ReUnion and ReSolution

2007-02-23T03:20:00.000-08:00

Oh cool...

I have a wonderful reunion in this chinese new year of boar. I believe every chinese around the world get my word. It is just like a Christmas day, Hari raya puasa or Deepavali celebration.

scHoolmates

We met family, relatives and friends we have long time not or never come across. We felt happy of someone's tying the knots, great of someone's promotion, regret of someone's leaving. On the other hand, we might feel jeoulousy of someone's tying the knots, humble of someone's promotion, smile of someone's leaving. It is not a problem what ever we might think, it is just a session or topic we have to face and then leave it later. But it is meaningful and fruitful to get together with all the people.

eX-colleagues

We have celebrated it from year to year, and we have made new year resolution for ourselves, I am not sure anyone really think it back of what we have or have not fulfilled for the past year resolution. Probably, one or two has been achieved! and the rest what to do? Ummph, just try another year to make it true? or just ignore it? I am not what others do, but I just made what i have to achieve from short-term and long-term plan. Isn't it clear to make and keep it instead of break it our own, so make the simple and achievable but it is what we have to do it to widen our mind and get ourselves grow up!

courSemates

Sounds simple, I believe whoever think as what I expect either! But, I believe only those who put the plan down to ground, only will get the result no matter good or bad, but we have to act on it to do the best we can and Experienced it. A dream never come true when no action come along, and an action never achieved when no Dream at all! So, both have to carry out together and monitor and control and improve. Oppps it sounds like Management? I think so, don't you!

SLCCC-coLLeagues

Happy re-Union in 2007 CNY and look forwards to coming years!

Get home

2007-02-08T03:22:00.000-08:00

What a wonderful time at home. Ya, probably only those have left home for sometimes or on stint would get me thoroughly. Why? Initially I really NOT experience the homesick feeling since i was born for the past the 30 years, not either get through those outstationed-dudes' sober and miserable, especially for the season of love and Chinese NY gathering time.

Probably i really had get by easily and took it for granted what i have around me. Ya sure, practise make you experience of a happening but not perfect, perfect just makes your DESIRE till not end and isolated. So, now the stint on oversea makes me more MATURE and tolerance, i will do the best to grow out it from time to time soon, yo!

I believe the married life also more or less change my thinking to be more reponsibility to my love wife ya, also my parents and family. What makes me so tremedously sudden change? I think, ya, a man and a guy difference will loom easily after tying the knots. Then, it is not a symbol of getting old but to go up to a new next phase in the life cycle i had never exposed to! cool, I believe this is what we have to get through and take on the new challenge we have to act on it instead of just a pure plaining dream.

Bali

2006-12-10T03:24:00.000-08:00

Bali, a place you never know it is basically so different from the other area of Indonesia. Probably it is a tourism place for every one to get through once for a vacation. I believe it is still full of Hindu-Bali culture no one can be denied that I really respect, for its history, its culture and its natural other than only the sea, sand and sun.

Why one have to really get relax or laid-back time only in a vacation? For re-charged of the tireness or pressure, or just a yearly routine for a breakaway? I am not sure. But mine is simple, with my new-wedded lovely wife.

It is fun and fantastic just to have with your love one in anyway but i still believe this great 3.2 millions population island will definitely make us not to forget our enjoyable momery in here!

Rainy, Windy & Sunny Autumn

2006-10-07T06:58:00.000-07:00

It is really unpredictable of Tokyo weather. It could be few rainy days, and then windy and sunny for the next few days in the autumn. Basically, I am really surprised that there could be a hot sunny day but still windy in Tokyo autumn days. A bit unbelievable for me from all day hot in KL.

Gee, it is cool and chilled out later!!!!!

Tokyo daily round trip

2006-09-22T06:50:00.000-07:00

Wau, what a wonderful working holiday trip in Tokyo! Today is Tokyo public holiday, named Aged respectful day. God i have never been come across so meaning holiday in KL. Well it reminds everyone should and must to respect those aged and senior, because we will be the Aged one day!!!

So, take the chance to go around Tokyo city and street. There is one day trip train ticket of Metro train line for 1ooo yen!!! I started the journey from Imperial Palace, Tokyo Dome, Ikebukuro, Nisin-Shinjuku, Roppongi Hills, Ometo-sando and back to Shibuya!!! Wow, it is really the hectic, exhausted but meaningful day.

Uummph, I am really impressed by the Japanese culture, the city scenery and the cleanliness of Tokyo, which yet not have been found in KL (Not all but also not less, KL still with the good food and greenliness). Emh, I believe every city still has its own unique and landmark.

Yokohama

2006-09-10T06:55:00.000-07:00

A great and contemporary port town outside the city of Tokyo. It is crowded and packed.

Just have the breathtaking view of Yokohama Port on top of Sogo building.

Harajuku, Tokyo youngster street

2006-08-08T06:40:00.000-07:00

It is the hot and humid day! Anyway, I have to pay salute and respect to these youngsters who really makes themselves up and dresses themselves up. They takes it for the granted and honorable to be so energetic ans awesome in here in every week. It is for the sake of their courage, fun, fashion and enjoy in this lovely stage. Then, all the visitors gathered around to 'kill' the photos with them in this funky show time.

Ironically, The Meiji Shrine is next to this. Cool or not, they really didn't care and ignored others perception!

Moody and emotional

2006-02-26T05:15:00.000-08:00

I believe that everyone has down and low mood time, evenif we know it is bad for health and mind. But, I think it is the way to relieve, relax and loose out all bad tempers from pressure. Am I right or wrong?

Sometimes, just a irritating phone call, an annoying voice or song, a mischievious thinking or an overwhelming passion from someone you dislike really really get on my nerves. I try to calm down and control my mind, but still I loose it out simply. I think it was a naturaly responses and nothing to do with any self-esteem or personal characteristic. Do I need to change my mind again or it was just a loser? I am still figuring out and pondering it over and over.

No one want to behave it so ridiculous, foolish, irrational and absurd when we have been an adult or a mature. Still, I have to learn again again again and again from all these blunders in the process of life...

We weep and sob, because we feel touched;
We think and change, because we get understood;
We go ahead if we stumble, because we get inspired
from someone who share and stand by us.

Esprit de corps or Malaysia Boleh?

2006-02-20T06:35:00.000-08:00

I just get a funny? or insulting? or sarcastic? forwarding email: Malaysia_Boleh.pps

After savouring this presentation, I felt ashame of myself. It would be probably I am out of the one who keep on complaining, grumbling, and showstopping. It has been happened in our life, work or social life. I can't imagine how much I have put the effort in completing a task on time with team spirit and without any procastination.

Why we (I) can't make ourselves calming down and relax the mind in order to listen and understand others' feeling before we really give our opinion and thoughts? Because we are self-centered? or self-egoness? or we just want to win in whatever circumstances. I was the one and still the one yet. So, I have been started to change my mind and do it in practically, mentally and physically. I keep on seeking advice and opinion in anything I am confused and lost from whoever in knowing it well. I know this would be a bit naive, over-reaction, or over-passionate about doing it, but I believe we are running out of time in doing and learning good thing for contributing the society, if we still stand still without proper belief and positive behavior.

Then, if we have stumbled down thoroughly and how should we raise up ourselves? we find our weakness and strength or we just find fault and blame others? The discouragement, distraction and discord will keep on overflowing in everyone minds, it is becomes a bad habit or a culture which already 'cultivated'! Goss! But the main weakness or defect is actually come from 'Communication', 'Thrust' and 'Esprit de corps'!

We don't communicate well and understandingly with others, we 'THINK' others know it?
We don't thrust others sincerely and candidly, we 'THINK' others have the same thought?
We don't work as team thoroughly, we 'THINK' others will do our part?

So, can we achieve our objective as what we have planned? maybe or probably on par.
Do everyone understand the main problem come from? The failure of the management or the Misunderstanding?

The answer: 'Communication', 'Thrust' and 'Esprit de corps'! Definitely comes with 'Rewards' when we achieve it successfully!

It is difficult to find a good friend who can help and inspire you.

2006-02-17T21:16:00.000-08:00

I just read a Buddhist article lectured by Dharma Master Cheng Yen,
[The Buddha said:"It is difficult to find a good friend who can help and inspire you." It is difficult enough to distance yourself from gossips and bad friends, and even more so to meet a friend who can really help and inspire you.

And what is to be expected of such a friend?
It is someone who can inspire your conscience and wisdom;
It is someone who guides you and helps solve your problems;
It is someone who transports you from the dark land of the ordinary person to the bright realm of the sage.

Yet in reality, how many people like this people, who help you smooth out your worries, round off your sharp edges and remove your biases, can be found?]

Anyway, i am a free thinker, but i accept whatever religious good belief for good sake of people.

Share another thought i believed most of us have learnt it in school.
[Confucius said,"When three men walk together, one of them must be my teacher; I will choose to follow what is good and correct what is not good."
meaning: When I am in the company of two other persons, there must be someone who I can learn from, who can be my model, while thre must be someone whose mistakes will also teach me a lesson. When we see what is not good in a person, we will reflect on our own actions and warn ourselves not to be like him. We see in him actions that are offensive and temperament that is disagreeable. This person actually deserves our gratitude because they are living examples of what we should not be. On the other hand, we should emulate the virtuous person because he represents the bright side of life. He has a positive attitude that brings joy to other people and admiration unto himself. And this is the person that we should learn from.]

A friend in need is a friend indeed. A friend to all is a friend to none.